You might be a Wall Street Occupier if :

Via MTPatriot

· You moved to a tent in Zucotti Park because you always wanted a nicer place to live.

· You quit your “job” to attend the protests, but your Mother continues your allowance and now does the dishes herself.

· You are confused that you can’t find the Wal-Mart on Wall Street.

· You are enraged that the taxpayers had to bail out Wall Street even though you’ve never paid taxes or know anyone who has.

· You hate capitalism but expect a capitalist to provide you a good paying job with great benefits.

· You think Socialism has something to do with Facebook, and Capitalism has to do with Washington, DC.

· You demand a job, forgetting that you were fired for not doing the one you had.

· You despise the rich even though they pay your share of taxes.

· You’re a little behind in your rent because your crack dealer insisted on cash.

· You are very clear in your protest objectives . . . “Scr _ _ the USA”, “Save the ______ (fill in the blanks – whales, spotted owls, sturgeon . . .)”, “Self-realization is the first step toward self-actualization”, “Down with … uh, … /everything/!”

· You think 99 weeks of unemployment is the least the government should give you for the 3 months you put in at McDonalds.

· You drove a Toyota to the protest, you’re plugged in to a Sony Walkman, talk over a Samsung phone, and play a Yamaha keyboard in a punk band but you are incensed over jobs being outsourced to other countries.

· You demand your rights, but can’t quite recall where they are enumerated.

· You believe you have a right to every penny earned, but the rich do not. And you base your claim on equality.

· You believe a man is greedy if he worked his way up to CEO on 16-hour days, runs a company employing thousands, and made $10 million last year, but is /not/ greedy if he made $50 million last year for making two motion pictures or shooting a ball through a hoop.

· You are convinced the “system” is holding you back from gaining wealth, status, and position. Dropping out of high school, dulling your mind with crack and MJ, a few arrests on your record, and stealing from your employer had nothing to do with it, I’m sure.

· You left behind trash, feces, urine-soaked sod, discarded clothing, and used condoms after your “Save the Environment” protest.

· You know you’re not a Socialist because you stick pretty much to yourself at parties.

· You want to improve the environment and you have the tattoos and piercings to prove it.

· You don’t pay taxes, but somehow that’s more than your “fair share”.

· You hate the rich but hope you win the lottery.

· You love the USA. Unions, SEIU, and Alinsky.