Why did the Occupier cross the road?

The People's Cube

-Because his Mom called and said, “It’s time to come home, honey.”

-Because ‘Ketchup’ broke her glasses during a fit of righteous crying and had to go to Lynz-Krafterz

-Because some radicals thought “free love” meant “unsolicited surprise sex”

-Because three homeless guys were occupying his tent "Help, police..."

-Because a few "more-equal-than-thous" (aka, Party people) appropriated [sic, smoked up] his stach for the Greater Good™ -- he had to score another bag of kind bud

-Because the police car looked like a port-o-john

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Help me out, comrades! What are some other reasons that would compel an Occupier to cross the road?