AN OPEN LETTER TO THE NSA

Via Bill

Dear Sirs, Madams and Otherwise:

I am not a terrorist.

Rumors to the contrary notwithstanding, I am not planning a violent overthrow of the current US government, nor do I anticipate engaging in such an activity in the foreseeable future. While I do have certain disagreements and issues with the current conduct of national policy both foreign and domestic, I have no illusions as to my ability to successfully mount, sustain and press forward to completion said overthrow. As a practical man, I see little gain in beginning a course of action that would have essentially no positive benefit for me and mine; therefore, I’m not the revolutionary/reactionary/domestic terrorist that you may believe me to be.

Given recent revelations vis a vis the government’s active program of domestic surveillance, I felt that it was necessary to write this letter to clarify certain issues which have almost certainly caused my correspondence and data to be stored away for analysis, or perhaps even caused my name to be placed on a ‘potential bad guy’ watch list.

It is true that I have been highly critical of a number of policies set forth and promulgated by current and past Executives and Congresses, as well as some of the decisions of the Supreme Court. It is true that at times these criticisms have used language which was deliberately intended to be provocative, as the use of such language is often highly effective in ‘stirring the pot’ of the reader’s mind. As this was my intent, I feel justified in doing so, and would remind anyone reviewing my words after the fact that satire and irony, while they seem to be dying arts, are nonetheless verbal techniques which we old farts once studied.

It is also true that I have made a number of statements concerning a possible future revolution against the current regime. While I am not actively promulgating said revolution (see above), my own study of history and current events leads me to believe that such a revolution is becoming more and more unavoidable with each passing day. Ultimately I am saddened by this; but again, I see no way for me to directly affect the course of events which will bring it about. All I can do at this point is rage against the dying of the light (as the poet said), and cry for the world I see today’s children having to endure.

So, keep this in mind as your computers churn away, mining my emails and comments and posts for signs of ‘suspicious behaviors’. There are still those of us who believe in the Constitution and the Bill of Rights, and that belief includes the idea that bellyaching and kvetching about the government is protected under the First Amendment. Of course, many of us also believe that our electronic correspondence falls under what the Framers called “persons, homes, places and effects” which are private and protected unless subjected to “due process of law” (the Fourth and Fifth Amendments)…and it would seem that these restrictions have been allowed (or encouraged) to fall by the wayside in the name of “security”.

I would remind you of Ben Franklin’s words about liberty and security. I’m fairly certain that you’ve heard them, but if not, a quick web search will pull them up.

In closing, I would repeat that I am NOT a ‘domestic terrorist’, nor do I plan on becoming one. I am old, fat, and physically incapable of doing more than mouthing off at the keyboard. My eyes are bad and my hands unsteady, which speaks poorly of my ability to hit anything I might aim at or construct any explosive device more complicated than a vinegar and baking soda balloon-inflating bottle. In short, I am poorly equipped to lead a charge against anything more threatening than a buffet line.

Please keep this in mind as you continue to monitor my electronic life.

Cordially,

The Administrator, Hype And Fail
(you know who I am)